It is far easier to expect or believe in a very conveniently packaged, concise set of instructions to life on this world that has all the answers and everything we need to know to be joyous and saved. (I am still trying to figure out what I actually need to be “saved” from, but that is a whole book in itself.) After all, if we have the Bible with ALL the answers we need, why would we actually assume the responsibility for our choices, our thoughts feelings and emotions and the events they attract to our lives that affect our growth and development of our potential? Hell, when life gets shitty we can blame the devil or god’s will or worse yet, we can believe we are somehow deserving of ill fate or punishment because of something we may have done, thought or said. That is utterly depressing to contemplate and yet so many of us have and continue to embrace that concept in our belief system.
My experience with reading the Bible – especially the Old Testament - has been less than enlightening and uplifting and seriously confusing and depressing. Where does it teach about the joy and beauty of life and this incredible planet we inhabit? Where are the teachings of how beautiful and good we are as human beings if we indeed were created in god’s image? Where are the teachings that illustrate the love of a perfect creator for his (or her) children? I cant help but ask myself why a loving father would feel the need to illustrate his teachings and the guidelines he set out for us in such a bloody, violent and threatening way.
The god of the bible absolutely has to be a major fabrication by some seriously ill people to create fear and subjugation in mass. The representations in the Bible just cannot be accurate portrayals of the nature of the being that created such beautiful perfection and balance in every living organism, system, body, planet, solar system, galaxy and universe. To create such perfection requires perfection and where does war, punishment, blood sacrifice and fear fit into perfection?
All I see in the so-called teachings is what sinful, dirty, unworthy sacks of shit we are and how we need to be saved from ourselves because we suck. Well, of course we do! As a society, we have become what we are told we are by our parents and they by theirs, etc. and then it gets reinforced by the god we are taught to believe in, through his “holy book”, ministers, priests, our Sunday school teachers and any number of otherwise well-meaning yet misguided souls. It is a proven fact that a person will become the person he or she is treated like by those close to them. For example, if a child’s parents consistently tell him how stupid he is, the child will believe it and will act stupid whether he is or not. On the other hand, a child consistently reinforced with how smart and beautiful she is will act and be exactly that. That is a proven fact. So how is it we think we are exempt from that effect from the “teachings” of the highest being that supposedly created us? We are not! We as a society are the product of generations of this dismal belief and domestication that has beaten us to the ground into believing we have to beg for the right to happiness and joy. Somehow we believe that maybe if we please this insecure, petty deity sitting on some golden throne by giving him 10% of our income and by showing we fear him through ritualistic adherence to his laws, we MIGHT avoid being “cast into hell” or the “lake of fire and brimstone.” What loving father on your block, in your neighborhood, in your city or on this earth, would tell a child of his own flesh and blood to go to hell and cast the child out into some form of mental torture (much less a lake of fire) regardless of what the child did? Somehow, we believe that the god of the bible would do that to us – his children - and we not only respect that but also worship it. What the fuck?!
If we read the bible with an unattached or undomesticated mind, it seems that it is not so much the sacred writings of a loving father that wants to guide us to develop our highest potential, as it is the ranting of an egocentric lunatic with control issues. Do we REALLY believe that God – whatever your concept of God is – the creator of such perfection and beauty is as big of a jerk as he comes across as in his “holy word”? Could it be that just maybe he isn’t? Could it be that many self-serving and ambitious men have meddled with the records there were and manipulated them to further their personal, social and political ambitions? Nah, that doesn’t happen with people in power now, does it?
As I look back at my life, I can very clearly see the extreme dichotomy of my “orthodox” religious/spiritual belief system. That belief in contradicting and unattainable joy and “glory” due to my imperfection and sinful state was my spiritual walking cane and yoke at the same time. I would find hope in the fact that there is this kingdom of god waiting for me if I do this and that, but by the same token there is this hell waiting for me if I don’t. Hope and despair skillfully balanced through unattainable yet seemingly reasonable standards. An impressive concept to keep us all trying but not quite making it, so there is always a need for the church to guide us to Zion. Interesting when we see the amounts of money that flows through the churches of the world isn’t it.
What if God, is truly a God of love that wants abundance and happiness for his children? Wouldn’t that make more sense?
My God, the God I believe in is just that - a loving kind and gentle God with nothing to prove and no need for us to prove anything to him. I see him cheering us on as we learn and grow and giving us everything we need in our very soul to be just like him – perfect.
I don’t claim to know exactly who or what God is. Is God a man or a woman, rich or poor, a working person in a blue-collar neighborhood, or an executive of a large corporation, a nurse, a doctor, a plumber or an electrician, a homeless addict or a drag queen in a downtown club? Is God the single mom struggling to feed her kids, the lonely desperate guy with the gun to his head, the prostitute, the child playing in the park or the mechanic that works on my car; the person that stops to help the stranded motorist, the guru, the felon, the laborer, the lowly, the neighbor?
My God is every one of them and more. My God did not created us in his own image but has reflected what and who God is in our potential. My God is not waiting or wanting to judge us, condemn us or thrust us anywhere. My God is you and me and everyone around us as we discover the love and joy that is who we are as we shed the years of fear, and self condemnation subscribed to in the name of Jesus, Jehovah, Allah, Elohim, etc.
My God is the beauty in every soul, in every creature; in every rock, plant and tree on this magnificent world we are a part of and that is a part of us. My God is the ghost in the meat suit we all wear and since everything in existence without exception is connected at a quantum level, then My God is ALL of it and I find no trouble in worshiping and loving that God at all. In fact, I find great joy and satisfaction in the realization that who and what I am is a part of that beautiful perfect creation. I am not broken, you are not broken, we are God and God us because we are an integral part of everything that is – including God. How can that be broken? Maybe we just need to realign our thinking and eliminate the aspects that don’t evolve us and cleave as the Bible puts it to those that do.
Stories are just stories, words to entertain or affect, move or influence the mood or thoughts of the reader. History is dead. The only thing that is real and that matters is the now. Find the love for yourself and you will love God. Find the love for yourself and you will love your neighbor. Find the love for your beautiful, perfect self and you will be whatever you want to be because you are a part of God. We just struggle with years of poisonous vile condemnation spewed at us in the name of god and religion that has kept our souls in the dark, begging for scraps of validation from a being that exists in our minds alone – minds that have been programmed to judge ourselves in a harsh and unforgiving way by the world belief system. Let us dare to break out and challenge that system. Let’s choose to change our belief in lack and strife and struggle into one of love and abundance in a universe of unlimited possibilities and potential. Let’s choose to not judge as we will not be judged but to BE everything we are by allowing that to burst out of its prison of fear and oppressive belief. Let’s dare to fly in the face of convention and say I have had enough of who I am not, enough of what God is not and enough of my belief in lack, and fear. Let’s choose to give life a try and stop hiding in the shadows of false beliefs and lies that have been handed down to keep us under control.
I know it’s radical because we are programmed to believe that it is sacrilegious and heretical to deny god, but I am not denying God.
I not only deny the petty, vengeful, miserably insecure god of the bible, but I say NO to that notion all together! That is not a God; that is a sick warped little man behind the curtain in Oz, (created by a very intelligent author) taking advantage of the munchkins that didn’t dare to confront his “Ozfulness”.
I would rather wither and cease to exist than to deny God, the God in all of us, in all that surrounds us and all that exists and all that we are an integral part of at the quantum level. I honor and love that God with all of my heart, mind and strength. I honor and love myself, you, and every bit of the beautiful creation we are a part of. I choose not to judge good or evil but accept that choices are mere events, and every choice comes with its own natural consequence. Some will evolve us and others will not. We choose our participation in whatever reality we want or are currently living through attraction by our thoughts feelings and emotions.